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The legendary copywriter of “Language of Desire,” “Text Your Ex Back,” “Text The Romance Back” and MANY more Clickbank WINNERS says . . .
“I Promise You’ll Want To Kiss Me RIGHT ON THE MOUTH After You Promote ‘How To Kiss A Man To Make Him Fall In Love!’”
Astonishing Conversions - VSL by 9-Figure-Copywriter Chris “Mr. Moneyfingers” Haddad - Completely Clean Offer with no “Sexy Stuff” (so you can promote it just about ANYWHERE) - CRUSHES Diet, Fitness, Personal Development, Astrology, Law Of Attraction, Home Business, Dating, Relationship, Parenting And All Other Women’s Traffic
From: Chris “Mr. Moneyfingers” Haddad
To: The GREEDIEST corner of your soul!
Hey, it’s Chris “Mr. Moneyfingers” Haddad . . .
(I got that whacky nickname because in my 12 years writing cash-hoovering sales copy my sales letters and VSL’s have sold an obnoxious NINE FIGURES or information products; made “regular duffer” clients RIDICULOUSLY rich; paid the mortgages of more affiliates than I can personally shake a stick at without getting tennis elbow and basically revolutionized how products in the “Relationship Niche” are sold online. Yes, my arm is sore from patting myself on the back right now but YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS INFORMATION SO YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN VERY GOOD HANDS WITH YOUR TRAFFIC.)
And I am INSANELY excited to personally invite YOU (yes, YOU! No, really, I mean YOU) to promote my brand-new offer “How To Kiss A Man To Make Him Fall In Love” . . .
Now, you might be asking yourself . . .
Why Exactly Should You Drop EVERYTHING And RUSH To Promote “How To Kiss A Man To Make Him Fall In Love” RIGHT FREAKING NOW???
And that is an AWESOME question that I have a WHOLE BUNCH of even-more-AWESOME answers for!
AWESOME REASON NUMBER 1: THIS %#$*@#@ #@$@# CONVERTS LIKE SOME KIND OF WORLD-SHAKING PREHISTORIC BEAST!
Listen: I’ve written a LOT of sales letters and VSL’s over the years and after practically BREAKING my precious Moneyfingers writing and rewriting this VSL (each time going DEEPER into the secret psychology of the women’s relationship market; stripping away everything that wasn’t ROCKETING traffic towards the sale and getting in touch with my feminine side in a way my poor mom really isn’t comfortable with) the “How To Kiss A Man” VSL is looking like one of the BEST and most RIDICULOUS converters I’ve ever done.
THAT MEANS when you send me traffic YOU GET PAID!!!!! 75% on the front end (90% if you’re a “Super Affiliate” able to send large numbers of sales on a regular basis), 50% of the upsells AND you’ll get my personal and undying LOVE (which I’m pretty sure you can’t put a price on but my wife says it’s worth at LEAST $17,493.16 a MONTH!)
In the past I’ve had affiliates say they BOUGHT THEIR HOUSE with commissions from my products . . .
I’ve had affiliates RAVE that they NEVER MADE A DIME on Clickbank before they discovered the WEIRD VOODOO MAGIC of my “Digital Romance” OFFERS . . .
HECK, I’ve even had an affiliate who calls me her “TRAVEL SUGAR DADDY” because every time she wants to go on a trip she just “cues up” one of my offers and waits for the “Travel Cash” to come pouring in . . .
Listen: If there is ONE THING that I am good at in this world it is writing astonishingly-cash-sucking VIDEO SALES LETTERS in the women’s relationship niche . . .
It’s basically my super power (TO GO ON RECORD, I WANTED TELEPORTATION OR TELEKINESES OR MAYBE THE ABILITY TO TURN GREEN THINGS VERY SLIGHTLY GREENER, BUT NO THIS IS WHAT I GOT!)
Which means you can feel SAFE AND CONFIDENT pointing your traffic my way because I will rip the throat out of the internet with my bare teeth to make you money!
AWESOME REASON NUMBER 2: Our Secret “One-Way-Spikes-Of-Doom” Upsell Method Is POURING Extra Cash Into Our Affiliates’ Accounts Like Some Poor Makeup Artist Pouring Foundation On Cher’s Face!
(I have nothing but respect for Cher and exclusively sing songs by her or Metallica at karaoke but the makeup is a bit much for a lady her age, isn’t it?)
Three years ago (when we launched “Language Of Desire” (which became the biggest women’s relationship product launch in Clickbank HISTORY and has been in the Clickbank top ten ever since) . . .
And during the SHEER MADNESS of that launch my team and I discovered an incredibly SNEAKY (but completely ethical) way to PUMP up upsell conversions by 30% or more.
We’ve put this “One Way Spikes Of Doom” upsell model to work on “How To Kiss A Man” (and ALL our DRI products) and have been doing GIDDY DANCES OF CHILDLIKE GLEE at how much extra MONEY our affiliates are making on EACH AND EVERY SALE!
Listen: I take a LOT of pride in the fact that our affiliates often make more moolah JUST on the front end with our products than they get from the whole “Kit and Caboodle” with other publishers . . .
(Heck, I’ve had affiliates say they would STILL promote Digital Romance, Inc. products over others in the marketplace even if we didn’t have upsells AT ALL because our stuff converts so freakishly well . . .)
But when you add in the MOUNTAINS OF MONEY you’ll get from our upsells . . .
Well, it’s kind of like waking up on Christmas, RUSHING downstairs to the tree to find PILES and PILES of AWESOME (and expensive!) presents, TEARING them open with your GREEDY little hands, having your CHEEKS HURT from how HAPPY you are and how it’s the BEST CHRISTMAS EVER . . .
ONLY TO HAVE SANTA COME RIGHT BACK DOWN THE CHIMNEY (with an assortment of strangely sexy elves) and give you CHRISTMAS AGAIN!
SERIOUSLY! IT’S LIKE HAVING TWO CHRISTMASES AT THE SAME TIME! DON’T YOU WANT THAT?
AWESOME REASON NUMBER 3: We Have ONE Guiding Principal At Digital Romance, Inc. and That’s To Make Our Affiliates (That’s YOU) LOTS of Money . . .
Hey, if you've been a DRI affiliate for any length of time you already know this particular "Guiding Principle" we run our company under.
Ready: "Our number one job is to make our AFFILIATES money. Not us, our AFFILIATES."
Affiliate marketing has been VERY good to us over the last 5-plus years . . .
(Hell, affiliate marketing pretty much saved my life.
Without the affiliate traffic fueling our offers while I was a freaking zombie during my battle with LYME disease I'd probably be homeless and comatose right now. So . . . thanks!) . . .
And we know that the more money we make YOU, the more money WE are going to make LONG TERM.
The stupidest thing you can do as a internet marketer is get greedy . . .
And the reason our offers still convert like gangbusters and why DRI will be around for decades to come is because we take the long view and do everything we can to take care of amazing affiliates like YOU.
I’m actually kind of OBSESSED with it. (My friends think a little bit too much of my self esteem comes from making my affiliates happy. What can I say? I like being loved.)
That means I will literally BREAK MY OWN BONES to make sure YOU get taken care of and get everything you need to be insanely successful promoting “How To Kiss A Man” and ALL of our offers.
(NOTE: Breaking of Bones To Be Taken Figuratively. Or Literally. Don’t they mean the same thing in the dictionary now? Is that “ironic?” Alanis?)
AWESOME REASON NUMBER 4: This Offer is 100% PG . . . So You Can Send It To ANY Women’s Traffic Source You Can Find . . .
LISTEN: “Language of Desire” (the last offer I got THIS excited about) has very good to me but it’s always had ONE BIG PROBLEM . ..
It’s just TOO DAMN SEXY!
No matter how much we gussy it up or how INSANELY that offer converts (and it does. It’s kind of freakish. I mean, I’m happy about it but it also MESSES with MY MIND!) . . .
Anyway, no matter how OBNOXIOUSLY that thing makes money on every type of women’s traffic you can throw at it, there are still a TON of places you can’t promote it because at the end of the day it’s about DIRTY talk.
That’s the whole reason why we created “How To Kiss A Man” in the first place . . . Because We Wanted A CLEAN Offer That Hit The Same DEEP Emotional Buttons Of The LOD Sales Video But Could Be Promoted Pretty Much Anywhere . . .
Cuz you know what? It’s REALLY hard for somebody to complain about kissing being “dirty.”
I mean, if Mcauly Caulkin (did I even SPELL that right?) can do it in that “My Girl” movie way back when he was like 9 that means it’s a pretty SAFE thing, right?
We’ve already had affiliates who couldn’t promote my last offer (“Stroke Of Genius”) say “YES, THANK YOU!” because they get to get in on the fun of a new Moneyfingers offer without having to get “dirty.”
AWESOME REASON NUMBER 5: You Get FREE Training In our DRI Affiliate Center Worth THOUSANDS . . .
You know what?
I really like talking about marketing and I really like TEACHING people about marketing and I REALLY REALLY like it when people come to me at conferences and say “Chris, that thing you taught me about marketing helped me get to that next level” (and then we hug and I feel like my life has meaning.) . . .
Which is why the DRI Affiliate Blog is veritably STUFFED with FREE interviews I’ve done with some of the smartest people I know in internet marketing sharing their deep secrets on everything from email marketing (that call I did with Tyler Bramlett really was amazing) to banner ads to podcasting to . . . a LOT of stuff.
I’ve had folks write me privately on Facebook before and tell me I give away better information than a lot of “marketing gurus” charge for . . .
WHY DO I DO THIS?
OBVIOUSLY it’s because of my deep, deep need for attention and admiration mixed with a healthy dose of IF I MAKE YOU BETTER AT WHAT YOU DO YOU WILL BRING ME MORE TRAFFIC.
Either way, you win!
And That’s It . . .
Let me see, did I get everything . . . ?
Make a lot of money . . . check!
Make even MORE money cuz of the upsells . . . check!
My whole JOB is to make you money . . . check!
My sense of self worth comes from making you money . . . check!
PG offer so the answer to “Hmm, will my list/traffic react well to this” is YES! . . . check!
Free training and secrets . . . check!
Yeah, that’s like it . . .
Oh, and Love. I think we also talked about Love.
So what are you waiting for?
Just enter your email below (or if you don’t like doing that just click the other button) and get in there and get all those FREE affiliate tools and get TO WORK so I can pay YOUR mortgage too!
Because you want to!
Because you need to!
Because it’s a good idea!
Because AMERICA (or wherever you live. I bet it’s great there. And probably less insane than here.)
I respect your email privacy
Chris “Mr. Moneyfingers” Haddad
From: The sky above America on the way back from DC.
P.S. Yes, Mom, this is how I talk to people I do business with. Yes, I know that’s weird for you. No, I not going to go to grad school. No, my affiliates don’t care what I post on Facebook, they care that I make them money. OK, I love you too. Bye.